6 Flirting Tips to Make Him Obsessed With You

"Ladies, you have to understand a man's viewpoint in garnering attention and romantic signals from a woman. If you are interacting with him in any way and he's attracted to you, he's going to make a move. He is not going to miss out on any opportunity to engage with you."

6 Flirting Tips to Make Him Obsessed With You
Photo by Maksym Mazur / Unsplash

I wanted to reshare a recent piece I wrote for Evie Magazine for women entitled, "6 Flirting Tricks to Make Him Obsessed With You" as it's evermore vital for women today to learn how to flirt more subtly.

Subtlety in all ways with men is feminine. It drives them crazy. As does being more passive in allowing a man to get in the driver's seat and make a proper move on you the way a man should.

I had a couple of girls in my femininity coaching group who are concerned with coming off as too aggressive with men in showing romantic interest.

And it's true that women who are interested in being more feminine may struggle with how to throw "the proverbial handkerchief" in a man's direction. There's a fine line to walk in being seen as prudish and stuck up vs. being too forward and aggressive.

In other words, it can be a challenge to playfully flirt with a man effectively to convey sincere interest without going overboard or being too pushy.

Here's a couple of extra tips I'd like to throw in the mix here:

  • Smiling, saying hi, along with being polite and approachable will work wonders for you alone as "the proverbial handkerchief". It's really not that complicated. When you smile at a man and demonstrate feminine warmth, he will take it from there if he's interested. Remember, men aren't dummies. They know exactly what to do.
  • Where they will find it off-putting is when a woman comes on way too strong. Just don't stare at him like he's a big, juicy steak and demand all his social media handles and you'll do fine.
  • Or worse, many women are known to be downright rude to a guy. They are very insecure in their femininity and they think that busting a guy's chops (akin to the way guys talk to each other) and mouthing off to him will get his attention. But when it's a masculine guy, it will just turn him off and he'll dismiss you entirely.

Had one girl in my femininity group in particular who was worried about how to message a guy on a dating app. She was very apprehensive in even getting in a man's direct messages to throw him that proverbial handkerchief.

She was also scared of rejection and didn't want to aggressively put herself out there leaving herself too vulnerable.

"What if I send him a short, catchy paragraph and he doesn't respond?"

No need to do that either.

Thus, I told her to send him something very simple like this:

Hi :)

Not too aggressive at all, not too vulnerable, not too chase-y, not too masculine. Subtle.

Ladies, you have to understand a man's viewpoint in garnering attention and romantic signals from a woman.

If you are interacting with him in any way and he's attracted to you, he's going to make a move. He is not going to miss out on any opportunity to engage with you. "Hi :)" will work perfectly for you and again, he will take it from there.

And I'm certain you will find the remaining tips below very useful and practical in addition to the others listed above. Now, let's take a look at how more simpler and subtler flirtations will work very well for you as a woman in getting a man obsessed with you....


Flirting is a lost art among women but it can surely be revived and instilled in you in embodying more feminine mannerisms, and you can use it to your advantage and get the lasting results you desire. In flirting effectively as a woman, you can make him obsessed with you.

It doesn’t take much to arouse a man through some more mild, feminine gestures and displays along with some playful demureness in piquing his interest. Historically, women could flash a wrist or an ankle and it would be considered titillating and provocative.

Regardless of today’s ubiquitous bare skin on display with little to nothing left to the imagination, you can make a man obsessed with you without having to show much skin at all. Through your visual and verbal communication and speaking to him in a way that’s inviting and really packs a punch, you’ll have any man obsessed with you in no time.

How can you make a lasting impression on a man through flirting that will make him obsessed? Let’s take a much closer look at some key techniques…

1) The hair-tie method - While tying your hair, make eye contact with him.

Your hair is your foremost noticeable feature to a man as it’s part of a woman’s overall feminine characteristic makeup.

Just at the mere sight of your long, luscious locks, men instinctively become aroused as it’s an uniquely feminine feature that men typically do not possess.

The vast majority of men don’t have long hair thus, in seeing your long hair, they automatically imprint it into your overall feminine shape and visage. It’s akin to women having breasts.

Men are attracted to breasts just by virtue of breasts being female.

Kimberly from the “Ask Kimberly” YouTube channel suggests using a hair-tie and twice pulling it up, taking it down and tousling your locks to flirt with a man from across the room. 


Allowing him to see your neck and ears will also add to your mystique. Men are visual and they like to gaze upon all feminine features of a woman.

With this in mind, tie up your hair, undo it and proceed to make eye contact with your prospective beau. You will send him a clear signal that you are interested in him and he will make his way over to you and break the ice.

2) The triangle method - look at each eye then his lips

According to Psychology Today, the triangle method is a “foolproof way to make someone fall for you,” however, they suggest not focusing too long on either feature as it can make the person on the receiving end feel self-conscious.

You don’t want to make a man feel self-conscious. You want him to feel strong and powerful in his desire towards you while engaging in this technique.

Instead, allow your eyes to dart over each feature in the shape of a triangle. Look at his mouth for a brief second, then look in his eyes. Focus on one eye then move towards the other.

You are looking in his eyes while also looking at his mouth. A brief, eye-locking gaze is mesmerizing in itself. Looking at his mouth speaks a whole other suggestive language to him that you are curious about kissing him.

He will then become very excited and stimulated by these seemingly harmless but highly potent flirting gestures. And he will start to become hooked on you where he will be dying for more.

3) The proper smiling method - don’t smile immediately when you first meet him, only smile when he finally tells you his name

You should always make it a point to smile at a man when you flirt with him. Men can be a bit clueless when it comes to whether or not you are actually flirting with them, and a smile can signal a lot.

Strategically smile at him when he introduces himself to you and tells you his name.

Proceed to say to him, “Hi, I’m Sarah. It’s nice to meet you…. Jake,” with a smile and lilt in your voice. Flash him that coquettish grin when you utter his name out loud and repeat it back to him. He will feel as if he’s the only man on Earth as all your focus and attention is on him.

4) Ask him to do a favor for you - favors will cause people to psychologically believe that they like you

Men are by their nature problem solvers and they love getting their hands dirty. They also enjoy being of service to women in ways that women may struggle with on their own.

Ask him to take a look at that warning light inside the dashboard of your car. Ask him how he might be able to assist you with some troubleshooting. Then allow him to look under the hood and play around a bit with the various moving parts of your engine.

This makes men feel important, useful and it also provokes his “protect and provide” instinct which makes a man feel masculine. It will also make him feel that he has bonded to you in performing specific favors and duties for you as a man. He will become emotionally invested in you just in the simple act of him looking under the hood of your car.

Don’t be surprised if he decides he wants to perform additional masculine favors for you, and soon. When that happens, he’s all yours.

5) Ask questions instead of talking about yourself, make him discuss his passions, and listen intently with intrigue

This is hook, line and sinker for any man. Virtually any woman who decides to take this approach will have any man chasing after her.

People are rarely concerned with the inner-workings of a man’s existence and what makes him tick. Men are in a default leadership position and are assumed to be in full control, thus they must have it all figured out and don’t need any babysitting.

However, you are not babysitting a man in asking him about what makes him a man. You are instead making him feel seen, heard and valued. Men rarely encounter a woman who is as passionate about his life as he is.

Ask him about his interests and hobbies and what areas he excels in. Listen intently to how he responds and express that you admire him for it.

“I love how you do that and you are very good at it. You are tenacious, aren’t you?”

Let him talk about himself while you listen with intent and hang on his every word. It will prompt him to open up to you where he will be wanting to establish a much deeper emotional connection because he’s already getting hooked.

6) Say his name in sentences

To add to the above point in #3, don’t hesitate to say his name in certain moments to add flair to the conversation.

A man will make the association of you feeling frenzied and drawn to him in uttering his name. He may even imagine you saying it while in the throes of steamy passion.

See how that works? You’re not in any throes of passion, but it sends his mind wandering. “What would it be like to hear her say my name and tell me she loves me?”

Let him think up these wild scenarios. Put his mind to work in problem solving where he becomes emotionally invested.

Simply saying his name will send his mind and heart racing. It also conveys a tone of sincere respect which men also find irresistible.

Closing Thoughts

Contrary to what you might believe, subtlety in flirting with men works to your advantage as a woman in getting a man obsessed with you. It’s very feminine and allows the man to use his imagination and puts his problem solving skills to good use.

Your hair, your smile, your voice and the way you say his name and listen to him intently packs more punch than you can imagine. And what ultimately makes him obsessed is the work he will step in and perform as a man to meet all your playful demands and win you.

Give him hints and let him take it from there and run with it. And he will be obsessed with you. Guaranteed.


And there you have it.

Flirting with a man and getting him obsessed has more to do with you "lying in wait" for a man than running after him expecting that, in doing so, it will make him obsessed. It won't. Because it just plain doesn't work.

Instead, invite and entice him to come to you, and come to you he will. Again and again and again.

Love and Many Blessings,

Jenny

Questions or comments on this column? Have an advice question you'd like answered?

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