The Many Reasons Why You Can't Find a Relationship
"You can wait as long as you want for marriage. This isn't the 1950's. You don't have to get married and have a family if you don't want to. And if you do, maybe you'll find love and start over at 50. My grandma's cousin's son did it, so can you!"
Hi everyone, after yet another long hiatus, I will be returning to blogging and YouTube streaming along with remaining on Instagram for the foreseeable future.
I deeply apologize for the inconvenience in not publishing content as of late as I've had two recent and unexpected deaths in the family this summer following my husband's illness and I had to take additional extended time off.
I appreciate your continued support through your kind thoughts, words and prayers and of course, through your contributions via your monthly subscriptions as they help assist me in keeping this site accessible and up-to-date.
With that being said, I wanted to begin the first of this series on "The Many Reasons Why You Can't Find a Relationship" and take a much closer look at why so many people are finding it extraordinarily difficult to find love in today's dating climate.
Anyone who is braving today's social scene in seeking out appropriate and suitable folks to date will attest to the fact that the dating landscape is a top-down catastrophic failure for the vast majority of people.
Here on this site I've spent the better part of the last 2.5 years helping you improve your behavior so as to put yourselves on more solid ground in terms of being more attractive, personable and standing out among the crowd.
And many of you have found great success, so congratulations on all your hard work! You've gotten engaged, married and you've began having families!
And many of you know I'm not one to pass the buck and externalize our own dating successes. I will continue to encourage people to always take responsibility for their own behavior and how they present themselves in their relationships.
Please keep in mind, this post isn't meant to blackpill you. It isn't meant to force you to feel that much worse and that much more helpless in navigating today's dating scene.
I'm simply going to lay out the cold hard facts as to why it's so difficult to find a relationship. Many of you tend to be very hard on yourselves in running into these various problems, and I want to help you understand that a great deal of it is out of your hands.
This will be a many-part series as there are numerous factors involved. So let's get started....
The Rise of Collective Insanity
The fact that society has gone off the deep end and into collective insanity isn't hyperbole and it isn't farfetched. It's a fact of life in modernity.
Any person can take a look around them and shake their head in disbelief and embarrassment at the state of the mental health crisis, marriage and family values (or lack thereof), the economy and the general nihilistic stance towards today's societal mores.
My Gen-X brother-in-law recently said that he can't believe the way younger people today treat each other. He said verbatim, "I wouldn't treat a dead animal the way these people treat each other."
I agree. I've been seeing many promiscuous women matter-of-factly blurting out their "L's" online e.g. discussing how many [insert expletive here] they took to the dome and how many dudes they let do it to them.
They talk about it as though it's not only normal but it's some sort of accomplishment of which they show immense pride and amazement in themselves.
How can a person who conducts herself in this manner ever hope to find a relationship? How does this behavior demonstrate they're worthy of love and commitment from a man?
It doesn't. And there are many women among us who espouse these attitudes and behaviors and are celebrated for it to no avail. 500,000 Instagram followers and they can broadcast their loathsome and disgraceful behavior and promote it to up and coming, vulnerable youth who grow up believing this is normal.
I just saw a video the other day on an adult film star walking the runway during New York Fashion Week. The person was all over the news and she was a "big hit".
So no, it isn't you. It's collective and widespread lunacy and social disorder the world over. Filth and debauchery is being celebrated and promoted among every available outlet while common decency and sanity are frowned upon. And you are standing there left in the dark as to how and why this could be, while feeling demoralized in your "audacity" in yearning for more purpose and meaning in your lives.
I suggest completely tuning out the filth immediately without delay. You see something repugnant, keep scrolling. Take a break and do some pushups. Get up and grease that doorknob that needs greasing. Bake that souffle you've been wanting to bake.
I've taken this route for years. I'm aware all this disgustingness is at my fingertips. But I don't peruse it. I willfully ignore it. It helps me keep a clear head and my faculties and soul intact. Do away with it, if you haven't done so already.
Dating Apps and the Commodification of Dopamine Swipes
I watched this eyeopening film below (courtesy of one of my followers) that examines in great depth the machinations behind the dopamine rat wheel of dating apps, with Tinder in particular being very damaging to the dating social landscape.
The commodification of people, sex, swipes, notification bells, "premium" matches, relentless ego-feeding and a sheer lack of social etiquette has altered the entire social fabric among young people.
The now infamous 6's, "six foot, six figures, six pack," is no longer a meme. It's an expectation that even the most average women place among men on apps.
And the top 10% of men cruising these apps who fall under the "6's" category are essentially farming likes and ego boosts from the top 80% of women.
These men have no intention of seeking relationships with any of these women. They are exploiting a smorgasbord of swipes from average to extremely attractive women they aren't even necessarily having sex with. They are looking solely for ego boosts.
"Kidology" states 80%+ of people on apps are there strictly to waste your time. They aren't looking for love, relationships or even hookups. Hence why they don't even say a word to you after you match them. They are looking for swipes and people to ignore, rile or aggravate in some way after they commence in matching with you to feed their ego.
The vast majority of people will tell you that dating apps are a dead end. Thus my advice to you would be to not take your interactions with any given person on apps seriously at all.
Rule: It's not serious until it's serious (in any relationship).
It's disheartening that people on apps want an endless virtual buffet of ego boosts and nothing more. And it's important to not take stock in apps if you want to find a serious relationship. It's akin to playing the lottery and does more to discourage you and wear down your self-esteem than it ever will in helping you find love.
But, you have to understand that the virtual world exists in a vacuum. People are using it for entertainment purposes only. It's like any other interactive game app on your phone and lends nothing to in-person interaction that ultimately leads to a long-term relationship.
If you are intent on using apps, please watch the above film and come up with a strategy. With the foremost understanding that it is a numbers game, it's a joke and isn't meant to be taken seriously. Practice detachment at all times and proceed with caution. Do not put any stock in apps because to do so will be to your own detriment.
The Whole of Western Culture is Against Long-Term Relationships and Marriage
Society would have you believe marriage is dead and you're fighting a losing battle in searching for love and a long-term, committed relationship.
And it's very likely that your own friends, family members, colleagues and associates are giving you very bad advice along the lines of, "You can wait as long as you want for marriage. This isn't the 1950's. You don't have to get married and have a family if you don't want to. And if you do, maybe you'll find love and start over at 50. My grandma's cousin's son did it, so can you!"
On top of this, if you are or were a purveyor of red pill propaganda, you likely have been programmed to believe marriage is a bad deal and that women as whole are a sham.
- No woman will ever be loyal to you
- No woman can ever be trusted
- All women are gold diggers
- All women have 80 men DMing them and simping for them, no exceptions
They're not even encouraging you to get your foot in the door and see what's out there. They made a "concrete" statement that women suck, marriage sucks and if you believe anything to the contrary, you are bluepilled beta bux and you will wind up getting divorce raped. NO EXCEPTIONS.
This programming is all around you, red pill or otherwise. Feminists have their own schtick in discouraging marriage and long-term relationships. Thus, you have found Instagram pages and blogs like mine and have been loyal to my information for years likely because you cannot get it from anywhere else.
It's pockets of "fringe group" folks like myself who espouse marriage in a way that makes sense. Outside of that, the subtle and not-so-subtle programming is everywhere that marriage is obsolete and you're supposed to be single 'til the day you wind up in a pine box. It's 2023, that's just the way things are!
This is a David and Goliath moment in the present-day history of mankind. Where you will have to have the resolve to believe in love, marriage, family and be unflinching and unwavering in your beliefs.
And the cool thing about it is, those who don't give up WILL find it. Many of you already have. Thus, you must stop believing it's impossible. It's very possible, when you decide you won't play along with any of this armageddon absurdity.
Stay tuned for the continuation of this series in tomorrow night's post where I'll be discussing mass under-socialization, boomerism and weakness and immorality among our culture and how it's affecting your chances of finding a relationship.
Love and Many Blessings,
Jenny
Questions or comments on this column? Have an advice question you'd like answered?
Write me: lovepilled@protonmail.com